Another look at a weird, weird world


We all have problems. Bills get piled up, kids run around with scissors, work becomes too much, etc., etc., etc.
Coastal Point • File photo

It’s during those times when I reach out for hope — a quest for people who either have it much worse than me, or do things incredibly more stupid than my own foibles. It’s human nature, right? We build ourselves up by climbing on the backs of those less fortunate or intelligent than us.

Without further adieu, I present some news from around the world that will make you feel a little better about yourself ... or, at the least, maybe puts a smile on your face for a moment.

A couple in Wichita, Kansas decided to explore the time-honored tradition of snuggling, or something, in a Dumpster, according to an AP story. Citing police reports, the story said that the 44-year-old couple climbed into a Dumpster Saturday evening for a little alone time, when they were interrupted by two men, who then stole their shoes, jewelry and the man’s wallet.

“Police said one of the robbers was a 64-year-old man who egged his 59-year-old companion on during the robbery,” according to the article.

I began reading this article by thinking that a 44-year-old couple should be too mature to explore this particular method of “Dumpster diving,” but changed my mind to thinking the same of the two suspects. A few moments later, I came back to thinking that the Dumpster thing was far worse. Then I realized that the two older men robbing them was the bad thing. Then ...

Oh, the whole thing’s ridiculous.

My search then took me to Columbus, Ohio — the home of Ohio State University and a young Lethario who has taken his warped sense of romance beyond the joys of Dumpster diving.

An AP story reports that three men robbed a couple last week. About two hours later, one of the robbers returned to the scene of the crime — an element you hear about often when watching Law & Order, but this one comes with a different twist.

He asked the woman for a date.

I’m guessing he read her signals wrong when he originally robbed her. Passion and horror are often confused.

Romance appears to be on the minds of many of the people who caught my attention this week. However, just the opposite was the motivation of our next stop.

A man was recently sentenced to three to six years in Pennsylvania for robbing a bank in Ephrata. According to the AP story, the man approached bank tellers with a BB gun, asked for money and demanded they call the police.

He later told police that he wanted to get locked up to get away from his wife, who had allegedly threatened suicide if he divorced her.

While many men out there are no doubt nodding their heads and pondering the possibilities, keep this thought in mind — he might find himself in a whole new “marriage” behind prison walls.

Oh, we’ve all had our bad days. Maybe it was a hectic schedule combined with a migraine, or kids jumping off the refridgerator to land on the dog, or what have you. However, a Connecticut woman might have topped all of us who weren’t busy in a Dumpster.

According to an AP story, the woman was charged a few weeks ago with assault at the hair salon where she worked. Later that day, she was arrested again for returning to the salon and stealing supplies and customer information. A few hours later, she was arrested for driving without insurance and not having a front license plate.

Oh, she brought on all of her problems herself. However, getting arrested three times in a day brings two questions to my mind. First, didn’t it occur to her some time after her second arrest to just stay home and call it a day? And, second, why did she keep getting freed?

The Honolulu City Council recently voted down a proposal to ban people who smell badly from city buses. The proposal would have made it illegal to have “odors that unreasonably disturb others or interfere with their use of the transit system,” as cited in an AP story.

Look, I grew up in Washington, D.C., and often took a Metro bus to and from school. It would have been an awfully lonely bus in the afternoon had that been the law there. But, well, I digress.